Hi, I am Miaowen. And I am already gone with the wind. To somewhere more peaceful. Life will be better.
GONE WITH THE WIND.
30Oct09I will stop posting here. Getting sick and tired. Starting to miss alot people. This blog will still be here. And will always be. Bye.
I have moved.
Darling, I don't want to break with you. Really , I love you alot. You always ask me why I am so deep in love with you. But now , I ask you why you made me so deep in love with you, then you leave me. Now you come tell me you don't even know whether you love me not. I really don't know what to do now. I can't help myself , neither can i help you. I miss you so much. But there's nothing I can do. How to not think about you. Everywhere is about you. Even my room.
I don't know why you suddenly change again. 为什么你跟月亮一样，初一十五都在变. sometimees you were telling me how much you love me. but now , it becomes like this, i don't know what to do. im waiting for you, i don't you to become like this. if you leave , i know i will become the another you. the emo emo emo ,only know how to emo you.
damien ang heng lee, i miss you. i hope we can patch back soon.
She has got brown hair,
28Oct09
They stand together.
I don't know how to face it now. Like now.
I hate the feeling of sending a thousand message , waiting for one word ans.
I hate the feeling when there's nothing I can do, when you take the blame
I hate the feeling when lose everything , when you are about to own everything.
I hate the feeling of you being hot and cold, on and off.
Lastly , I hate the feeling of losing you.
You can say I am deep in love. But I really love you.
Went out with Marlene today, super fun.
I don't know what to say anymore.
27Oct09
I WANT TO GROW UP TO RICH. WHEN LIFE WILL NEVER BE A PROBLEM.
why would anyone choose beauty over wealth?
She didn't understand what we spoke,
27Oct09Went to school super late today , but I had parents letter kkk.
but it ended up , that school was nothing.
grace and ranice looks nice in contact lens.
after school , went out with darling.
like so many days never see him ):
we met at bugis, walk around bugis.
then decided to go orchard area.
so we went to ion to buy yami yoghurt.
then walked to far east,
went to eat KFC again :D
cannot finish , then call darling help me finish again ;X
then around the mall very long , then saw alot of things to buy.
but bought nothing, save money :D
darling went to police HQ , i went home.
heard that his case is settled, love him so much (: hope to meet you soon.
The feeling suckz, 3 more days as 2e2 , before everything breaks up.
never had this kind of feelings before, in pri. school.
it has always been 1f , 2c, 3c, 4c , 5c, 6c.
except for that f class, which i wasn't close, and i was still young.
i had never part with my classmates, it's really very sad.
not much people can tolerate my noisiness in class,
hope to get into same class as via.
how am i going to cope without cheryl koo, eugene, olivia.
life will be so different , i will be standing in a different place,
with different people surrounding me , how would that feel.
we've to learn to accept the change i guess.
Damien Ang Heng Lee , miss you like super super loads loads ):
26Oct09
Mr Seah got a super nice camera, and his hobby cost him alot.
Skip about those days. Friday went darling's house , saturday, had band performance, sunday went vivo city.
Today was disastrous. what's with the jumble sale, no customers, or should we say target audience, most students were on outings , and sec2s don't get a single chance , in escaping from the school. that's like so damn unfair.
jumble sale was boring , and i was emotional, i didn't know what to do , what will happen next. i was scared. like really very scared. our class didn't put in any effort. i was rather pissed , cause some bimbos dance, like they are the dancer in audition. it's like what the fuck. just kept walking constantly , dazing , don't know what to do.
the personal grooming was even worst. cause some really ugly trainer , was wearing low cut and it's like so damn weird, hey auntie , we are having a personal grooming talk , not a dance or ball. the talk was boring, it turned out to be an advertisment for some facial company. like oh well.
went back to class, took our stuffs, seems like no one came up to give any instructions , so me and cheryl , went off. i bought standard ticket, to somerset. then olivia called and say , we are not suppose to go yet, mrs dheeraj say whoever never report to her, will get punishment , didn't wanted to go , cheryl say go back , then go back , but in the end, we reach srg , tap out , then kit ju say no need go back. i went like !@$!@$%@#%^#$&$%&$%^&#% cause , i paid for the standard ticker. -.- fuck whoever waste my money/
went to cineleisure with koo , and ate suki buffet, ate alot ,and we ate for 2 hours, i was doing alot of funny acts. then we went down orchard road , and just trained back.
Damien Ang Heng Lee , I love you , don't leave me okay. I will haunt you down , i know where you live, i will make you realise, that there's still truelove
大牌
21Oct09不懂你是谁，也不想知道太多
不知道你心里想什么，我们互不相干
2 days never blog.
computer is down again , what's with the internet system nowadays.
so using tablet pc now
and now finally able to blog
yesterday, took back results. all pass except for science which is kinda obvious, so it's ok although | onlygot 32/100 , but even mummy says its okay, since my standard is always like that, furthermore, I want to be an undertaker, so erm it's okay!
after results, went to AMK to eat suki sushi and eat alott. after that , the fucker came to fetch me outside school. still have to rush back to school, quarelled with him on the way back, what fuck is he. tell me , what fuck you tell me. ran home, change already , immediately went to work.
shift with wenling , damn fun, we were talking about alot of things, then like no business one. she very nice and friendly.
today.
woke up late , so didn't meet darlings for breakfast. thn directly cab to school , cause was super late alr. digital art was okay , didn't go for band , cause my stomach was very pain; but still went to meet my dear :) took mrt to aljunied, thn waited for him at the station. when he came with his friend , then walk halfway , started raining so damn heavily. i was all wet. shoes wet , blouse wet, skirt wet. then go darling's house. fell asleep again. he only love to facebook :@ after that went to hougang mall , then i bought the chicken chop again. super nice :D went to cut my fringe . no more bangs ): very sad , after 6 months, it's finally gone.
darling pei me until sengkang mrt station, then he went to jubeat again , i also want learn how to play ): he going grandlink tmws. i working tmw. friday he seeing police, i friday got detention
fuck you ,i don't care. fuck off, i dont want to know. fuck fuck fuck.
Lilith
18Oct09
If I am born as a deer, I will hunt and kill tigers.
If I am born into a poor family, I will rob the wealthy of their riches
If I am born without legs, I will break everyone's leg
If I am born hearing impaired, I will slice off everyone's ear
Thats's justice.
Just finished Low Kay Hwa's latest novel - Lilith. totally cruel.
XiaoEmo next on the list.
He's a bug, I pay for every single book. And he reads them all for free.
Assholez.
Lilith
To forget you
A photogenic life
Journey
You are here
I believe you
Destiny cries.
Left 2 oldest one. Let me save money to buy the leftovers. Or is anyone selling ? :D
Yesterday was great.
Caught an Elmo using only $3
Today.
Total unluckiness.
Went out with no money in wallet, no money in EZ link card. and no money in POSB card
Left with nothing, except 55cents. Took a bus to work ,
and was late.
Work was okay, not as tiring.
Beanie is more interesting,
met darling after work.
Went to Bishan and eat meatball noodles.
Couldn't finish , darling help me finish.
Then ate yami yoghurt, very nice.
Then we took 156 home, i fell asleep.
Luckily , he know where to stop.
Thanks darling.
Stfu
16Oct09
Ballooney And Ice cream
Why did we end up in Punggol station.
Hi Chicky Pie, Happy Bwirday tuhh chiew.
Yesterday was fun. But disappointing. So decided to meet Shermaine at 2. Reached Compass Point, saw Lionel and Asley. When I first saw Lionel, I couldn't recognize anymore. So I spot for the nametag , then write : LIONEL NEOH. I tap his shoulder. Then both Asley and Lionel looked at me, Lionel was like :errrrrr, errrrrr, errrrrrrrrr. Miaoning de jie jie. WTF. My 师弟 forgot who I am already. And it's really very sad. Asley recognized me though. But I want Lionel ):
It's okay, met Shermaine and went to town. Went to Far East, had alot of things to buy. but in the end , chose not to buy anything. Shermaine bought alot of stuffs though. Haha. Walk walk walk. Went to Ion to walk also. Then we went Orchard Central. Nothing one ...
Then walk to Dhoby Ghaut, then darling told me he reached alr. So I went to find him , and Shermaine went to find her family I think. Darling went to play Jubeat first. Shall learn how to play after both my hands is okay. Then went to Carrefour buy peach tea. Then go food court eat fried fish soup. Then walk around searching for present for Chicky Piez/ Meowz. Then bought the super ultra cute , shit softener, and I did a very nice card for her. TT
Then darling pei me take MRT home, then he go home again. Always make him go here and there ):
Darling with his girlfriend :D
16Oct09He's one great player,with worst video quality.
Get Flash to see this player.
Disappointment everyday.
15Oct09
Hey , it doesn't matter anymore already, seriously , it doesnt matter anymore alr. I am not going to care about you. I don't recognize you anymore. Who are you?
Exams are over (?) , doesn't feeel that it's over. Probably , very guilty for not studying anything. Yesterday was tiring.
Science was like so relaxed la. Cause I completed the MCQ , then hmm , randomly choose some questions from the chemistry paper. physics was better, i find physics easier to understand. I never do 21 marks worth question. Plus some was just randomly , totally guess one. Without having any idea.
After exams, went to circle line there to change, change already , bag super heavy, then just nice spotted my mum , so i went and pass and everything to her. Then took MRT to habourfront. Went vivocity, had a great time finding what to eat. Ended up with Subway.
Then went to cinema , and buy tickets for the meatball show 3D one :D show started at 2pm , so we went to Daiso, play with water, take pictures , then go Giant buy somethings to eat. Then went to watch the movie.
The movie is like super damn funny la , olivia sit beside keep on laugh one. Tsk.
After that, chiong home to bath and change into uniform , then go work lor.
Need to injection, very scared, but in the end , nothing one la. ZZZ, i have been worrying for so long.
maybe going town with shermaine later. alot alot alot alot alot alot days never see darling alr ):
Failure,
14Oct09
Don't like the feeling.
suddenly started crying, i don't know.
sudden disappointment in myself
it's not as if i never tried before,
i tried listening to what mr choo , miss rozianna.
in fact, their class , i seldom talk.
but i never got what they say
why can't i be like others, while they go on ranting about covalent bonding.
and sketching on a rough paper , on how to draw a ray diagram.
why am i always the outcast of everything
why am i always different from others.
i am disappointed in myself
why is it so hard to understand such a simple thing .
they are just subjects for you to study
but yet you don't get a single shit out of it
what are you. what are you.
14Oct09
I am sorry darling ):
i am so stupid, always make you pei me home
until sengkang , thn you have to take bus home again , so lonely
always making you pay everything , although i always fight to pay, and always lose.
you have to accomodate me in everything i do.
and i always end up to be the one angry over stuffs.
i am always so childush and ignorant , never care about your feeling.
how stupid. darling, i love you alot. sorry for all my mistakes.
):
chinese exams was ok today , except that i kept wanting to sleep.
but i still manage to pull through.
after exams , went to eat mac with ranice, grace, jiawei.
big breakfast.
aft that, went to the market with ranice , bought cherry tomatoes and some vegetables,
cause i felt like cooking something for my lunch.
ate lunch, then sist. friend came. awhile ,
went compass to fetch darling into my house, then use computer,
he teach me how to do chemistry , went to CDAC awhile.
then went home lor. he went home ):
tmw science, and wild wild wet. happy or sad ? ._.
don't wanna take science next year. like pretty please ):
That day you went away
13Oct09
You don't get such a nice scenery all the time.
Mathematics was so great and awesome, that I didn't do question worth 16 marks. I think I have disappointed Mr Low , or maybe he didn't have high expectations on me ): Whatever it is, Maths exam sucks. For the past 4 years, since p5 , never had a chance to complete Maths examination , kinda want to know what's the feeling of completing the exams and sitting down there nothing to do ):
Went to eat lunch at Hougang after that. I had mee sua. Then go eat mango , very nice :) I ate alot today. After that , went to play badminton with some kiddos. Then went to sleep at home.
Never meet darling today ):
Shall go study physics later, My plan will be leave chemistry paper blank.
y=mx+c ?
12Oct09
Don't get a single shit out of Mathematics TT
I was staring hard at my 1A textbook , and I hardly understand anything about Polygon, I was still spending my time figuring what's a Octagen =_= So regretted not attending Maths lesson during sec.1, I had spent my time outside class talking to weird people walking pass.
Lit paper was disatrous, totally have no confidence, even though I was typing. Type so short la, I don't know what I thinking. Got so many points, but not enough time. TT
After exams, went to meet WJ kor first, take something from him, he's so funny. Then darling came Serangoon find me, so we went to eat brunch with clique at Mos , Bishan , after that slack awhile. Then study maths, i told him gradient = rise/run , he tell me some very cheem equation. How to cope with A/E maths =_=
Went to Hougang to buy the taiwan chicken chop , then mama call me eat outside, so went compass to eat korean seafood tofu soup (Y) Darling pei me home, then he went to Macs to study with his friends.
TT PSLE OFFICIALLY OVER TMW. My sister will be playing likeeeeeeeee =_= While I still have chinese and science to chiong out. TT
Don't feel like going for science exam , cause I don't see a point in going.
Don't sms me after 18th October, I will have a new no. Sorry to change no. again.
MEGA MAXI SIAN DIAO. BAIBAI.
What matters now , is I have got you with me.
11Oct09
I hate chiew.
I will never forgive you.
You might have done one thing good, but you did 1000 bad stuffs.
Stop forcing me into drinking wine or what bloody shit.
Then aft that , when you get agitated,
you start calling me a a fucker or a bastard.
Or even a dog, what rights do you deserve to scold me this.
Now is you say don't want to talk to me, don't come in kbkp i tell you.
Dumb cheebye sucker bo lan jiao fucker.
I cried 2 hours today. What a loser =_=
I have nice plans for my future. I am starting to hire people for my undertaking company.
And now , I have my sister and WJ kor. hehehe.
I hope this motivation continues, till I grow up.
I will be happy with my life.
Literature tmw , I think I am ready. Don't know whether I write properly, since my finger suddenly like no feeling like that =_=
Macbeth, macbeth.
I will prefer The Outsiders.
Oh yes, did I mention that I am gonna sell my outsiders at $20.
It's worth. You buy from Popular one is empty. But mine, you practically got all the notes inside.
Hehe. Interested tell me. If no one want buy , then maybe I give Janet.
To my AngHengLee darlinggggggggggggggggggggggggggg :
sorry for being wilful everytime ! sorry sorry sorry.
you don't try to be funny i tell you.
I love Padang with you.
love you loads :D
Unbelievable.
10Oct09
Somethings are really unbelievable.
Weijie kor has changed like !#$%@#^#$^$%^#$^#$%# alot.
From the super duper emo guy , who wanted to commit suicide, to someone contented with his life.
He's the best kor la.
From crying , until now I am laughing.
He suddenly become super funny. And super high.
Yay , no more ' haix' or 'dun tink too much le'
He's really motivating me into doing great stuffs
He's happy with his current life now, which I am really very happy now.
He has always been the one cheering me on, and giving me the courage to do things.
I hope he gets on the right track soon.
I feel really motivated now. Thanks to this funny guy. Work towards my dream. I am Miaowen and I will become an undertaker one day. And plan the most gorgeous funeral, for the dead.
I love Thai guys, not those pending for transexual operation. Thai guys are hot , I think. The way thai speak is like super hot. Got the dia dia sound one. My dad loves teaching me how to speak thai. His favourite is always 'thao rai'. He sounds funny when he talks to his workers. Even Jingying also learnt something like kang keng. Funnaye.
Da Endorphine is so cool and hot.
Shall go and sleep, alrights, I feel so motivated. Gonna study for my literature exam tmw. Since it's so late now. Or should I say in the afternoon today. Lit class ! :D Though I don't see how undertaking link to literature, but they are all loves.
Thanks to WJ kor once again. thanks to your near death exp. ,it woke me up !
Hide your emotions.
10Oct09Feels like crying. I don't know. So many things gonna happen.
Our cannon in D
09Oct09
We have bangggggggggggggggggggs.
Hi good morning. Yesterday was disastrous. Early in the morning. Mr Chong called my name during assembly.
" The gang around Miaowen of 2e2"
ZZZ not a good sign for DMs to recognize you too much.
And we were so good that we skipped art lesson. While everyone was at the Amphitheatre, me , grace , ranice and sara was in class. Talking crap. And I love ranice's hair. Very nice and long :) Then Jolyn called us, and tell us that Vanita coming up to find us. All of us , chionged to toilet, and stayed in the janitor's room. And we freaked Evonne and Shi Ying I think.
Went for recess. went to find Miss Vanita , couldn't find. Then Mr Chong came and call us follow him. And awesome, we have got 3 detentions after examinations. =_=
Chemistry quiz was totally empty. Here's a funny conversation.
Jintang : whats h20
Miaowen : isn't that water ? :O
Miss Rozianna : thank you miaowen for reminding.
Miaowen: huh . but that's the only thing i know on the paper .
zzz
don't wanna take science next year. how do i achieve. try not writing anything on my exam paper.
went to study with damien and shermaine at macs anchorvale. funny funny. damien is funny. he's always so enthu in answering the maths question. but in the end, he was shocked that he can't solve =X hahahahahhaa.
okay , bai bai. feels like eating KFC. fast food. (Y)
nope, not gonna feel jelous anymore. get over it.
Canon in D rock version.
This video was so long ago. Remembered it was on ClaraL's blog. It's super nice. I love it (Y)
I thought you were the one
08Oct09
I LOVE GOH KIT JU :D
No matter what happens , we will always be there alrights ? :)
เด็ก ชาย , พี่ รัก แก
I don't know, I feel really confused.
It's obvious to see what's going on.
How am I going to survive like this ;/
I don't know what I am thinking.
Tired tired. Everyday , just can't control. Will just keep on sleep in class. Esp. Chinese and Eng. I paid extra attention on Physics today. But I guess, it's too late. Cause it's our last physic lesson. T.T
Feels like laughing ,,, Don't know why. Just feels like laughing.
k , random.
And so I was packing my stuffs just now.Trying to arrange my stuffs according to subjects. Then I found a few weird stuff. Like p5 Science Centre class photo. And my birthday card from Genting. Oh yes, and my English MYE which i used left hand to write. So many stuffs.
Tomorrow will be the last day , 2e2 will study together as a class anymore. Tmr will be the last lessons in my sec2. life. 2e2 's gonna split. This time, we cannot be writing another letter to Dolly Ong, going on protest that we refuses to stream. Since everyone's taking different subject. The feeling is gonna be weird. What I hope for is at least get into the same class as Olivia or Cheryl , cause i wouldn't be so lonely anyway ): I don't know whether should go on and pursue literature. I just feel like I will go some lousy class. But it's alright. I should have seen this coming. What has been done , cannot be undone.
Feels so tired. Waiting for Damien Ang to reach home. Gonna study maths tmr. Gonna complete all the papers he had given. Gah, it's gonna be hell. I wonder how to skip from Chemistry tmr, since I didn't memorise a single shitz about my chemical formuale, cause everything's in school. Die. Somemore, I sit in front of the teacher. Don't know how am I going to cheat or something. Think Rozianna will scream and shout at me. ZZZ.
I don't know why , but i am panicking alot. Like alot.
Cause I am like super afraid that I can't be an undertaker when I grow up.
I also don't know what to do. But I know , this line must from young learn one.
Somemore, dad was telling me that this kind of things , people won't teach you one.
That's why, I am so fearful of not becoming an undertaker.
But in the first place, I don't even know whether I am afraid of death.
Just very sad, cause I can't become an undertaker ! !@#$@!$@#$@#%#@$%@#$!#!
Damien Ang , when are you reaching home? ):
The day you went away
07Oct09
To my dearest Bryan junior.
Today when I saw you during recess , I saw your face, there wasn't a single smile. Then heard from your friend about what had happened. I was also very sad you know , cause you are my closet junior togther with Elson. You must be strong okay , this kind of things is very common for us at this age. You have to learn to accept.
And the most touching things is your ' You are the best senior' , you know I am really damn happy, cause I had always thought I failed as a senior, for always poning band as and when I like, and not teaching you well. Though this time, it's not a band stuff, but I still cheered you up. I finally felt like a true senior. We must all jiayou for everything coming ahead of us :D
Thank you for everything. I wonder, how long more will I still be a Zwinds Trombonist. How long more. Daddy finally allowed me to go for HK trip. Provided I pass all my subjects. If I fail , I am not only not going for HK trip , but will also be quitting band. Can he stop forcing things out of me. Haix, how am i gonna cope it, I don't know. I suddenly realised my interest in Band, how envious was I in primary school . Seeing those band students staying in aircon and played the music, while I have to run in the sun everyweek. I still miss those days as an athelete, but still have to give up.
But now Band is my CCA , and I am giving up halfway. I feel like a total loser ):
9 more days, I will be sleeping the whole day. Or going to work -_- But at least better than chioing out those stupid examinations.
Time practice today maths paper. * Mr Low shakes his head vigorously at me * Good game.
Needs to work on Science and Maths. Damn.
I like singing london bridge is falling down.
To my dearest Damien Lover :
Tomorrow will be start of Main Paper already.
So must jiayou alrights,
I want you to go 6th floor alrights ! ^^
And the police case tmw, hmm.
Just say the truth. Don't lie.
Like what you had me.
Everything will be alright , trust me :D
To my dearest dearest dearest dearest Cheryl Koo :
Don't say I ignore you already.
Cause I haven't. Only this few days only.
Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry ! ):
Will pei you more alrights.
I still love you just like last time lor.
GOOD GOOD GOOD luck for your exams okay.
And get into the class you want !
ZzZzZ , needs to go memorise complicated chemical formula.
Tiamo ,
06Oct09
I AM A HAPPY KID.
Tucked in school uniform for girls are cool :D
Think to the positive side - I have cleared 1/2 of my examinations already.
Just 4 more to go.
Lit , Chinese , Science , Mathematics.
Die already ._.
Yay , MR RON LOW CONFISCATED MY 'HI I'M MIAOWEN' nametag ):
He was standing in front of me, and burst out laughing.
' Hahahahaahah, creative nametag'
Then he made the handsign to call me take off.
And pass to him.
Disappointing. No more cool nametag !
I love Bryan la.
We are gonna have something nice for our dearest Cindy.
Thanks to Bryan. And stop thinking the wrong side can.
Zzz., you better come find me , if not I will kidnap someone up i tell you.
Wants to sleep. Wants to sleep. Wants to sleep.
bai bai.
Pretty boy
05Oct09Affected.
It just seems that lots of things are affecting me.
I don't know how to feel.
Something seems to bother me just right before examination.
My energy seems drained out. Everything doesn't seems ok to me
Things changed so fast.
I need a surrogate. Then I can stay at home.
Feels a little tired. Bye.
A photogenic life
04Oct09Yet mi-yea
Yet mi-yea
Yet mi-yea
Good evening. Lazy to blog, got a pair of new haviannas. And I am tired. Good night.